Monday, August 29, 2022

Lessons From My Elders: Bring in the Light, Clean the Counters, and Put on Lipstick

 

Light through the window. Playa del Carmen, Quintana Roo, Mexico. November 2010. Credit: Mzuriana.
Light through the window. Playa del Carmen, Quintana Roo, Mexico. November 2010. Credit: Mzuriana.

Every morning, I open my window blinds and receive the light into my space.

Every morning, in the physicality of that action, I remember my mother. 

Every morning, my mother also opened her blinds, or shutters, or curtains, or drapes - whatever the window treatment was in the house she occupied at the time. 

She also told me how important it was to clean off the kitchen counters. Even if there are dishes in the sink, she said, a clean counter makes the whole kitchen look pretty OK, and it makes her feel good, too, she said. 

She also told me how important it was to apply lipstick in the morning (and in her years of youngish matronhood, how important it was to refresh that lipstick before my father returned home from work).

So what do these prosaic actions have to do with aging? 

  • There are small actions we can take to create our own environment of ease, beauty, and dignity. 
  • We have control over these small acts; they are expressions of our self-determination. 
  • They send a message to those who enter our spaces: You are dealing with an elder Who Keeps Up. 

To each her own on whether or not to apply cosmetics when one is traveling in the Land of Age, but here are some thoughts about its power, gleaned from the Women's Health article, Why Putting On Lipstick Makes You Feel So Awesome

"... lipstick provides a reliable tonic in trying times. ...  it often serves as a symbol (however small) of health and vibrancy. 'Lipstick helps restore a normal sense of self that a patient can lose during incredibly difficult cancer treatments and help them feel like themselves,' says Bobbie Rimel, M.D., a gynecologist and oncologist...."

"[Poppy King] recalls ...  'Lipstick immediately made me feel different on the inside ... like I was capable of more with it on than I was without it.'" 

"As Audrey Hepburn so succinctly put it, 'On a bad day, there's always lipstick.'"


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